How to manage children?

After a child is born, parents not only need to take care of the child's diet, daily life and physical health, but the child's education is also very critical. If the child is not well educated, it will easily affect the child's lifelong living habits and personality. There are many ways to manage children. Parents can learn more about parenting knowledge, understand their children's personality and inner thoughts, communicate more with their children, and pay attention to their own words and deeds to set an example for their children.

How to manage children well?

1. Get to know your child better

While busy making a living, parents must take time to learn more about their children, communicate more with their children, nannies, and their children's teachers, and try to have a comprehensive grasp of their children's performance in kindergarten and at home. The more you understand, the less misunderstanding there is. In this way, once the child is really disobedient, you will understand better how to guide the child.

2. Absorb educational knowledge

Society is changing, and the environment in which children grow up is also changing, so the way of education must naturally continue to improve. As a parent, it is your responsibility to actively absorb new knowledge about education. In traditional parent-child education methods, parents mostly use authority to educate their children, and beating and punishment are important methods of authoritative education. Absorbing new knowledge can help parents break away from their own growth experience and adjust their educational concepts in a timely manner.

3. Listen to your child patiently

If a parent is furious, the most direct reaction when facing a child who disobeys discipline is usually to curse. At this time, Teacher Cheng Guiying suggested that parents calm down first, try to be more patient, and ask their children why they did this. When parents focus on understanding their children's thoughts and finding ways to help them solve problems, they may find that their children's behavior is actually understandable and that they have released a lot of negative emotions.

4. Truly let go of your pride

Some parents always like to maintain their dignity in front of their children and are used to treating their children with a superior attitude. In this regard, Teacher Cheng Guiying specifically suggested that parents should really humble themselves, respect their children from the bottom of their hearts, stop speaking to their children in a commanding tone, and respect their children as adults. Don’t always say “no” to your children. Instead, give them choices and let them make their own decisions. If the child is old enough and has no problem expressing himself, you can also let the child come up with solutions or alternatives himself.

5. Talk to your children about the truth

In addition to usual admonitions, parents should also teach their children certain principles in real-life situations. Let your child have empathy, let him experience things from other people's perspectives, and truly understand how his behavior affects others. As for the way of explaining the truth, the depth of explanation can be chosen according to the age of the child. For very young children, storytelling can be used.

6. Let your children experience

If children always refuse to listen to adults, then parents can let their children experience the consequences themselves, as long as their children are safe and there are no bad consequences. Through their own practical experience, children will be able to deeply understand how correct and important their parents' teachings are.

7. Negotiate with your child

Don’t always ask children to live according to adults’ wishes, otherwise not only the children will suffer, but adults will also suffer. Children are also human beings, and of course they have things they want to do. Therefore, negotiating with children and making concessions may be a good approach. For example, when a child wants to jump on the sofa, but the parents have something to think about, they can ask the child to jump on the bed in the bedroom, or ask him to wait a while before jumping, or wait until the parents have finished their business and then take the child to the park to jump as much as he wants.

8. Not disciplining your children when you are angry

When parents are extremely angry, they will definitely not be able to discipline their children in a rational way. Therefore, when parents cannot calm down no matter what, Teacher Cheng Guiying suggests that they temporarily leave the scene or divert their attention to do other things, such as calling friends to chat or listening to music. Wait until you calm down and then have a good talk with your child.

9. Revise your expectations for your children

Sometimes parents are really too eager to achieve good results, and often hold their children to standards that they themselves cannot achieve (perhaps parents think they can do it, but in fact they have never done it!). You know, children are still young, and it is normal for them to be active, stubborn, forgetful, etc. If parents really want to have some requirements for their children, they must also consider their children's growth conditions and not always look at their performance through a magnifying glass.