How to educate children when they fight_How to educate children when they are bullied

When two or three children play together, fighting is inevitable, and most of the time it is caused by fighting over toys. Often such fights among children will also cause their parents to join in, which is a very bad phenomenon. When children fight, parents need to mediate or educate them instead of helping them fight. So how do you educate children who fight? How do you educate children who are bullied?

When their children are bullied, many parents’ attitude is: “I will not offend others unless they offend me. If someone offends me, I will definitely offend them.” Because cowardly children cannot survive in a society where the strong prey on the weak. Do you agree with this view?

"My daughter Yubaoer came back from kindergarten a few days ago and said that a kid (a boy) hit her face on purpose. I asked her if she fought back, and she said no. I said, then don't tell me. If you are bullied outside in the future, remember to fight back. Fighting or not fighting and not winning are two different things. If you lose, I will apologize to you and say that it was my fault that I didn't teach you well enough. Let's continue practicing in the future. If you win, I will celebrate your success. Don't tell on her. I don't know if my daughter understood or not, but she said it to me very seriously!"

This was a very popular post on the forum a few days ago. It resonated with many parents, who posted comments and liked the post. This undoubtedly represents the views of a group of parents today: good people are often bullied, and good horses are often ridden. Children should cultivate their wolf nature and bloodiness, and fight violence with violence when they are bullied. They should uphold the attitude of "I will not offend others if others do not offend me; if others offend me, I must offend them", because a cowardly, silent child cannot gain a foothold in a society where the strong prey on the weak.

But there is another point of view: aggressive children win the present, but have they won the future? Fighting violence with violence is like using one mistake to fight back with another mistake. This cycle of revenge will only make the mistake worse. When we want our children to be kind and tolerant on the one hand, but at the same time teach them to fight violence with violence, isn’t that contradictory? Who can guarantee that today’s self-defense counterattack will not turn into violent confrontation tomorrow? Kindness is not incompetence, tolerance is not weakness, we should say "no" to violence.

Children are the apple of their parents’ eyes. Sometimes, when they make mistakes, parents are reluctant to hit them. But now they are being bullied by others outside. They feel really bad. Faced with the children's own little tricks, should parents teach them to fight back with violence, or should they promote tolerance and let their children repay evil with kindness? Today, we bring a set of effective martial arts secrets to all dads and moms - teaching children how to "fight"!

Parents might as well let their children learn to fight. Professor Feng Dequan, a child education expert, believes that "children can gradually adapt to group activities through fighting, and learn a lot of knowledge from it, such as how to reduce pain when being beaten, how to regulate emotions, how to avoid angering the other party, how to forgive each other, etc." Children over the age of 3 can compare the fighting power of both sides and the teacher's attitude based on the situation at the time, and decide whether to fight back, dodge, turn enemy into friend, or ask adults for help. "For young children, being able to think of ways to avoid or seek help does not always mean being cowardly. Sometimes it is a sign of being resourceful and able to protect themselves from harm."