How to educate a naughty and disobedient child?

Young children will more or less show naughty behavior, so from the perspective of parents, we must first look at the child's behavior objectively. It is normal for children to be a little naughty. If a child is particularly well-behaved and obedient everywhere, then it is a bit abnormal. On the basis of objective view, parents should find out the reasons why the child is naughty and educate them in a targeted manner. Never stop them blindly.

How to educate a naughty and disobedient child?

Reasons why children have uncontrolled behavior

Analyzing the "criminal" behaviors and psychology of children that anger their caregivers The main reason why most infants and young children often exhibit out-of-control behaviors is that their needs are not met. In order to attract the attention of caregivers and adults, they will do some so-called "criminal" behaviors in the eyes of adults. As for children who are beginning to develop a sense of autonomy, they want to do everything by themselves. However, their development is not yet fully mature. If they insist on doing things without sufficient ability, the result will of course be that they will not be able to complete the task and may end up making a mess. When caregivers see this process, most of them will simply do it themselves to help the child, but the baby will not let the caregiver intervene, and a deadlock will occur.

In addition, individual differences between children can cause them to react differently when faced with the same event, and some may even lose control. For example, when it comes to unreasonable and naughty behavior, some children must be satisfied when they want something, and they will cry and make a fuss if their desire is not met, but some children will not. When training their urination and defecation abilities, some children can learn quickly; on the contrary, some have less ability and need more time and patience to help them learn as soon as possible. There are also children who do not know how to get along with others and who hit or bite others. These situations occur due to individual differences and are common in the development process. They are not intentional mischief.

Calmness makes parenting smoother

Although caregivers may be angry when children exhibit unusual and out-of-control behavior, the children themselves actually feel bad when the incident happens. Especially when children exhibit out-of-control behaviors, they are very anxious, and their physical development will show signs of restlessness, stuttering, and falling. Sometimes they will tremble with nervousness, bite their fingers, or hold on to their dolls. At this time, they will try to control the outside world to reduce anxiety and restlessness, and may even not let the caregivers do their own things, but they must have the caregivers by their side. These are all due to the formation of self-concepts, but lack of stability, and psychological and emotional instability, which leads to behaviors. When children are angry, they actually realize that their behavior is inappropriate, and they are not deliberately going against the caregivers or making them angry.

When faced with a child’s out-of-control behavior, many caregivers cannot accept it and will beat or scold the child immediately. However, this method will only make the child know that he is wrong, but not where he is wrong. It will also hurt the harmony between parents and children and is not appropriate in terms of parenting. What mothers need to pay attention to is that when children "make mistakes", caregivers should first adjust their mentality and face it calmly. Caregivers need to know that even adults cannot achieve 100 points, so do not require children to meet the standards. Accept yourself and accept your children's behavior. At the same time, you should handle the situation calmly with the mentality that "the child's behavior that makes you angry is not intentional to go against you, so don't attack me." After you calm down, you can tactfully explain to the child the reason for your anger, tell him that this is wrong, and tell him how to behave correctly. The most important thing is that every child is different. Don’t make comparisons. Instead, let each child develop naturally according to his or her personality.

Effective emotional transfer method

Although we need to adjust our mentality to face children's criminal behavior, sometimes when we are furious, we just can't calm down. In view of this, this magazine proposes the following methods for caregivers to refer to, so as to successfully divert anger and face the problem properly:

A. The couple supports each other. When one of them is angry, the other will go on stage to face the child first, so as to help the angry one calm down.

B divert your own and your child's attention, take the child away from the scene and do other things, while you think about how to face the child better.

C When the child is acting unreasonably, ignore him and ask him in a calm voice: "What do you want to do?" or tell him what you are going to do and ask him if he wants to go with you.

DWhen a child loses control of his emotions, pat him at the right time, wipe his face with a wet towel, let him drink some water, and then talk to him nicely after he has stabilized his emotions.

E Understand the reasons why your child is crying or throwing tantrums and see if it is caused by your negligence.